Forgetting Failure and Being Awesome in 2014


I’ve made no secret that my 2013 was, to be diplomatic about such things, fucking atrocious. But as we leave 2013 behind and welcome 2014 with open arms, I am one of the billions of people who have a list of resolutions for the year ahead. In the past I’ve published these massive lists of all the things I wanted to do in the new year, and more often than not they focused on relatively superficial things, like visiting Greece or planning the perfect Valentine’s Day date or finally getting those diamond-studded fingernails so I could say that “my bling makes words sing.”

Not this time.

This year, I am focused almost exclusively on self-improvement in some fashion, whether it be rediscovering my personal identity, finishing what I start, or following the siren’s calls of my own fleshy overworked heart.

So, here are my personal resolutions for 2014…

  • Find a Job. This is far and away the #1 priority for me in 2014, and I don’t think I have to explain why – but I’m going to because, you know… blog. Not only has being without work been a hit to my bank balance, but I have found that unemployment has bored me into a form of mental paralysis. For better or worse I am somebody who identifies themselves quite strongly by what they do, and I take great pride in my job and my work. So to be without that personal identifier has started to gnaw away at my sanity a smidgen. I also miss making games, so being able to return to the gaming industry would be pretty damn spectacular, since it’s the only career field daft enough to employ a nutcase like me.
  • Finish The War on Christmas. So, full disclosure: there is a completed draft of The War on Christmas, dubbed “draft zero.” This is the version of the story that was written without any form of editing, as almost a free-flow stream of consciousness linking scenes and chapters together. As you can imagine just from that description, it is presently a colossal mess and will require a page one rewrite before I let even my closest friends gaze upon it (except for one, who read a few paragraphs when it was just sitting open on my laptop. She laughed, so hope springs eternal).
  • Use my YouTube. There are things I want to write, mostly about the dissection and analysis of godawful popular music, which simply doesn’t lend itself well to blogs. YouTube, despite its recent tomfuckery with its content flagging system, lends itself well to the creation of the kind of content I want to do from time to time. This in no way means I’d abandon the blog – I am a writer, after all – but I’d be expanding to do other things. But before I can do this I need to buy the equipment, and to buy the equipment I need to follow through on point one.
  • Return to Military Shape. Since mid-September I have dropped 35 pounds. While I would love to attribute this to a steady regiment of running, weights, and a general shift in my lifestyle, the truth of the matter is that it probably has as much to do with stress and heavy smoking as it has to do with my returning to the gym on a regular basis. Regardless, I’m down 35 pounds and now when I take my shirt off I look like a glue stick that’s been left out in the sun for too long. I require definition. I require my Army abs.
  • Be More Positive. I had this one listed with my last round of New Years Resolutions, but then 2013 happened. However, if I took one thing away from that whole 365-day ordeal, it was that when you allow positivity to triumph over the forces of negativity and dickishness, people around you tend to smile more. I am sucker for making certain people smile. So, 2014, do me a solid and let up a bit, eh? Help a brother out.
  • Get the Girl. …I think this one is pretty straightforward. NOTE: In the event that this actually pans out, the resolution will update to read “treat girl like the most wonderful woman in your world because she is, you fucking ponce.” “You,” of course, is referring to me. I’d never call you guys poseurs, poseurs.
  • Sling Words. Get Money. My personal motto. I should have that tattooed on my forehead so I can see it in the mirror every morning, I think. …no, that actually sounds like a horrid idea. The motto is good, but… yeah. Forget the tattoo idea.

There you go, ladies and gents. I want to spend much of 2014 focused on improving myself, so that I can improve the lives of those around me. I also want to have another Disneyland weekend with my best friend, visit the great white north (Canada), and speak on more panels at gaming events – and if I hold true to the above, I should be able to do just about all of these.

NOTE: The title of this post is totally ripped off from a phrase Kiri Callaghan used in a Twitter conversation. You should follow her on Twitter, and hound her about where you can find her exceptional book Alys because you’re grown adults and don’t need me doing everything for you.