If you aren’t quite aware yet, Christmas has passed. I apologize if you’ve missed it. Now that we’ve gotten all of the yule tide cheer out of the way, it’s time for us to crack open a few (cases of) beers, sit in the deafening silence of contemplation, and comb over the year that was 2014. For me, 2014 was a year of ups and downs, highs and lows, victories and defeats. My personal life came crashing down around me as I finally hit rock bottom, only for the floor to give way and allow me the opportunity to see just how far down the hole I could sink. On the flip side, my professional life was given a breath of new life as I started working on a curious new project. Between these peaks was a smattering of good times, and bad, but mostly good.
As 2014 limps towards the finish line I figure it’s as good a time as any to look back at the year that was in a snappy, short, and gimmicky manner.
I summarized 2013, month-by-month, using only six words. I blatantly ripped the idea from the excellent Six-Word Memoirs, and in the end I think it was useful in helping me pinpoint which moments or emotions from that point in my year stuck out the most with me. 2013’s list was chock full o’ loss, frustration, and bitterness. As you can see, 2014 starts off the same way. But as the year went on…
- January: Stephen King, My Senpai, Noticed Me
- February: 28 Days of Jack Fucking Shit
- March: Abandoned Gaming to Work in Hollywood
- April: Hollywood Sucks; I Wanna Make Games
- May: Lies, Damned Lies, and Sad Realizations
- June: I Was, Briefly, a Community Manager
- July: Second Place in Dream Job Race
- August: Oh. Hey. I’ve Hit Rock Bottom!
- September: PAX Renews My Faith in Friendships
- October: Oh. Hey. I’m Making Games Again!
- November: Overdose on Aspirin Because of Toothache
- December: Well, it’s Ending Better Than Expected
For much of 2014 I was dealing with a plethora of personal issues, and there were more than a few instances where I didn’t think I’d be able to persevere. My depression, a constant enemy, reared its ugly rat bastard head more times than I can count, and there were moments where I was starting to buy the bullshit it was selling me. Yet every time it seemed that I had no way to cope I was reminded that I am surrounded by good people; gentle, kind, loving friends who knew when I needed a kind word or helping hand, and who knew when to step back and let me handle my shit. The debt of gratitude I feel for each and every one of my friends who have put up with me over this past year, especially this summer, can never be properly repaid. I can only hope that I am a fraction of the friend, and show a fraction of the kindness, understanding, and patience that they have shown me.
As for those of you who take the time to endure my rantings, ravings, mood swings, and random #hashtag games on Twitter, I can’t thank you enough for your understanding and kindness. Y’all have saved me from the pits of despair more times than you’ll ever realize. I would not be half as strong or composed as I am today without y’all, and I can only hope to keep y’all entertained and engaged. I love you guys.
I know that I’m not the only person who had an awful year. 2014 hasn’t been a kind year to a lot of people, and I know that many of you are anxious to see 2015 creep into the room and snuff out 2014 with the promise of a brighter future (and a pillow). While much of my year was one calamity after another, I’m thankful that I am able to look back on the year and say that, through the fires of adversity, I am a better man ending 2014 than I was when the year began. I’m working again. I’m writing again. I’m rediscovering the things I used to love.
2014 was also the year that I swore off hard liquor; I haven’t had a drop of anything stronger than Brother Thelonious since May.
So, no. 2014 wasn’t a good year. But, unlike 2013, I can look ahead to the next year and see an upward trajectory. Things are starting to improve, and with some good fortune (and a couple of lucky breaks) I’ll be ending next year as a much happier person than I am today.
Now, let’s go forth and make 2015 ours.